Dropped Call (Right at the Answer Diss)

Fourteen minutes of hold-music-jazz, and then someone finally picks up — "Hel—" — and the line goes dead. The specific cruelty of a dropped call is that it waits for the exact worst second: not during the hold, not during the phone-tree maze, but in the half-syllable between hello and whatever you've been trying to say for the past quarter hour.

Episode 22 of The Daily Diss leans into that particular betrayal. The beat runs a choppy lo-fi string stab over an 808 kick and a snappy snare, with the phone-line disconnect beep — three flat tones, dead air — chopped into the rhythm as its own percussion hit. The hook is built for the moment you realize you need to call back, press one for English again, and brace yourself for a longer wait than the first time. Seventeen minutes, as punishment. Our MC narrator recounts all of it with the dry, slightly exhausted delivery of someone who has genuinely accepted that this is just how it goes now — and who is, in fact, completely fine.

Lyrics

[Intro] Fourteen minutes on hold. Fourteen. Minutes. That little elevator-jazz loop. The same four bars. Hold on — it's ringing. It's actually ringing. Oh—

[Verse 1] It started innocent, I just had a quick question Something 'bout my bill that needed one correction I dialed the number, pressed one for English, pressed two for billing Pressed five for other, pressed zero hopin' someone's willing Robot said "your estimated wait time is fourteen minutes" I said fine, okay, I'll wait, I got commitment Pulled a chair, got snacks, got comfortable, got invested Fourteen minutes of jazz-flute — I will not be bested Then it clicked — the hold music stopped, the silence hit golden Heart rate spiked, I sat up straight, the moment was holy I heard a breath, I heard a click, I heard a "Hel—" And then — beep beep beep beep beep beep Dead. Air.

[Chorus] Dropped call! (Come on!) Right at the answer! (Nah!) Fourteen minutes! (Really?!) Gone in half a syllable — come ON Dropped call! (Are you serious?!) One word in! (Nah, nah, nah!) I heard "Hel—" and then the line went flat Who does that? Who does that?

[Verse 2] I called back immediately, hands shakin', mild fury Dialed the same number, took a deep breath — jury's Still out on whether I was gonna stay polite But I was civilized, I was prepared to fight right Press one for English — I know, I know — press two for billing Estimated wait time: seventeen minutes Seventeen! They added three — as punishment, I figure For having the audacity to drop me at a whisper I'm giving credit-card digits to the air, I'm talkin' To a ghost, to a signal, to a tower that stopped carin' I had four more numbers left, the expiration, the CV— Beep. Beep. Beep. You've reached voicemail. Please leave your message after the tone.

[Outro] I left a voicemail. I described the whole situation in the voicemail. The hold time, the drop, the callback, the second drop. All of it. They never called back. I disputed the charge online. It took eleven business days. I'm fine. I'm completely fine. …beep beep beep beep beep beep.